Random Things

...I have essays to grade...

...I don’t need a theme or a structure or even a cohesive idea. Right? I can just write some things down and upload some pictures and that makes it a blog post. Right?...

…Cap’ Ron mentioned some time ago that Anthony Bourdain was his new hero. I was more of a Les Stroud fan, but I’m leaning Bourdain’s way. This is why Jesus invented DVR technology. I’m pretty sure he is the guy that any of our significant others would leave us for, gentlemen…
…while I’m sort of on the subject of reality television I might as well cop to watching 4 straight hours of The Deadliest Catch the other night while The Colleague was out of town. Sure I could have been productive in my sleeplessness, but isn’t it better to watch someone burn through their own fingernail with a hot needle to relieve the bloody pressure building up behind it? Gross. Also, I don’t care how staged the fishing and filming is for that show, it would be a brutal, scary job. No thanks…

...this is pretty much how I spent Memorial Day weekend:


…The Learnin’ Factory is bound to be on the news soon. Someone is angry about no longer working for this fine institution of higher learning, and I have a feeling said someone is going to keep making a massive scene about it…

…My father doesn’t know a damn thing about boats, how they work, or how to sail them. Nor does his neighbor the McMillionaire. So they are of course the perfect candidates to buy a 1935 48’Atkins Cutter that needs to be completely refit and rebuilt. Great plan. It will either cost three times as much as they plan or take three times as long to get it finished and launched. Maybe both. The real wager is how much of the work GVB will be coerced into doing…

…congrats to Al B on the first tri of the year. Nothing like swimming in Long Island Sound in May. Al’s extremities will be back to normal temp any day now…

…and there’s this dickhead…

…Here is a picture of the student population of one of my Research Writing classes:

Now I know why their work is so stellar and why they are never in class…can you pick out the ones who will never play a single inning of professional baseball? If you said every guy making a hand gesture AND/OR flexing his arms, you’re right! Seriously, everyone in the front row is in my class. All of the future ex-ball players with eyeblack on were in my class in the winter. Sigh…

…but seriously, congratulations to our college baseball team on winning the championship. Enjoy your three year minor league careers followed by a crippling day-to-day job roofing houses outside of Mesa, Arizona…

…how much do the Mariners suck? Did someone from Oklahoma City buy them too and not tell us?...

…I couldn’t make this one up: “On July 3rd, 2007, Amy Stewart purchased a vanilla latte at a Starbucks drive-thru in Kent. When she put it to her lips to drink, the top popped off, spilling the coffee down her front and burning her. She filed suit against the coffee giant in King County Superior Court on April 25th, 2008. Her husband joined the case, suing for “loss of consortium” – legalese for sex and other spousal-specific activities.” Does he have to prove that his sex life was good enough that the loss of that sex life was damaging to him? Can’t wait to see how this one plays out…



…you are all free to join the GVB-Colleague boycott of Starbucks, by the way. Not because of loss of consortium (which I assume only applies to married couples, right? Because no one else should be consorting) but because they keep fucking up our drinks at the drive-thru. Lattes mysteriously get flavor added to them, cappuccinos taste like lattes, and drip coffee is scorched beyond its natural life. Add to that the insult of the “upsale” (would you like more something expensive and fattening with that?) and we have a good reason to drive on by. Still, the convenience of our local drive-thru kept us going back. And then last week I ordered two drinks. Total $6.47. Bubbly Upsale Barista happily smiled and handed me $13.00 in change. “So, is it policy now to keep the change?” “Oh, you wanted the small change too? Let me get my manager to open the register for me.” Seriously? I know it isn’t much in the grand scheme of things, but you owe me $13.53 you bitch. Give me my money!

… The University of Colorado is considering a $9 million program to bring high-profile conservatives to teach on the left-leaning Boulder campus…

...it need to be summer now. That is all…