Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Running and Not

Lots of things going on these days. You can get warmed up with some other reading:
Check out RPD's travel posts from Argentina.

Groove on over to the BiCoastalBoys place for some sports-related bitching and griping.

Want a little taste of the rampant racism in this part of the country? Read this disturbing article from the Seattle Times.

Let's see...what else is there? Oh, those 4 Amy Winehouse tickets we have for September 25th are now worthless. Thanks Rehab!

On the plus side, I found a nice curvy route from The Palace to The Learning Factory today. Commuting on the 650 just got more interesting.

Also? Meet us at Engel's Pub Thursday at 6:00. Motorcycle optional.

Hitting the track tonight for some speed work. Cap'n claims some work-related excuse to get out of running around the oval? Slacker. Update to come.

Here's something: on my last two long runs (18 and 19 miles, respectively) I have absolutely suffered through mile 15. From 16 on I feel like I could run forever, but 15 is like running uphill pulling a sled. You distance folks help me out here...I am pretty sure it is at least partly mental, but I also know there is a fuel issue in there somewhere. I'm going to try fueling differently during this week's long run (20 miles on Sunday) and see what happens.

Another query: It's time to start thinking about a goal pace for Portland. Any wisdom and race strategies are welcome at this point. I reserve the right to ignore you.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Today's Depressing Thought

When I read articles like this one...

Contractor scams $20.5M from Pentagon

...totals like this piss me off even more...

Cost of the War in Iraq
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Wednesday, August 15, 2007


I know that I am officially training for a marathon when I drag my sorry ass to the track for speed work. I don't mind the speed work itself (this time it was 1/2 mile intervals at a 6:30 pace), but on this particular night the track at Future Colombine Style Rampage High School was a lovely sociological survey of the worst the neighborhood has to offer.

Actually, to be fair, this is more Cap'n Ron's neighborhood than mine. I haven't sampled the Tragedy Circus at the track in the new hood yet...

So, with apologies to RPD's recent post, here is a look at the cast of Track Night at Mega High School.

1. Short Girl Driving Slow in the Fast Lane. Put her in a Honda Civic and put a cell phone to this girl's ear to make her a little more oblivious to her surroundings and she'd be a perfect stereotype. You might be running fast for YOU, but that doesn't mean you need the inside lane. I love having to pass you on the right twice in one lap. Try the center lane.

2. Mom Says I Can do Whatever I Want! Mom is yapping on the cell phone, blindly pushing a stroller with a toddler in it back and forth across the trach, while older son and three of his hoodlum friends play with a frisbee they stole from a different set of less assertive kids across the way. Fun Game #1: jump in front of oncoming traffic. Fun Game #2: Jog alongside runners mocking their strides. Fun Game #3: Wildly throw the frisbee around so you stupidly run in front of people who are training. GVB thinks, "Get the fuck off the track you punks!" GVB says, "Hey guys, can you play on the grass and not the track please?" I'm so fucking nice. Pricks.

3. Youth Football Coach. To be fair, this guy wasn't on the track, but running football practice for 14 year old boys inside the oval. After watching his one star athlete run Toss Strong Left 50 times, during which said star athlete repeatedly bowled over Smallest Kid on The Field, I was starting to feel bad for Smallest Kid on The Field. Once I heard YFC openly mock SKOF for being, well, 14, I lost any respect I might have had for this fat wannabe football legend who, to be fair, is volunteering his time. Of course, what else is he going to do after he gets off work at the Home Depot. Prick. Repressed childhood issues, much?

4. Football Dad Sitting on the Track. I mean ON the track. Acres of grass sideline, a sidewalk near the fence, the hood of his Buick Regal...he could have sat his fat ass down in any number of locations. Nope. He took his $7.00 KMart lawn chair and set it up in the two center lanes of the track. Dead center. Cap'n Ron and I debated the mental disability that causes one to act this way. I said arrogance. Cap'n said oblivion. Perhaps the arrogance causes the oblivion. But even when I practically hurdled the prick, he didn't see that he might be in someone else's way.

4a. Football Dad Sitting on the Track Followup: After a half hour or so, FDSOT got up and walked over to talk with Other Football Dad about god knows what and LEFT HIS GOD DAMN CHAIR SITTING ON THE TRACK.

Ahh the track. It's almost as tragic as the Burke Gilman Trail. Almost.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Holy Shit! I Have a Blog?

The Colleague kicked me in the head this morning with one of her thousand pairs of shoes (ask me how I know this number…) and reminded me that I have a blog that she used to read. But since my room full of monkeys at typewriters hasn’t produced anything of note recently, nothing has been posted. Slacker Monkeys. The close second cousins of Spider Monkeys.

So let’s play some catch up. But first, watch this clip. It may be my favorite YouTube clip since MyDick...

Here’s what GVB has been up to, in chronological list form:

1. Cursed everyone in the department and packed up for the summer. Fuck you, Sweater Girl and Pear Shaped Woman!
2. Delivered the 650 from Boise to Everett.
3. Sailed with The Colleague to Port Townsend en route to the San Juans.
4. Broke down in Port Townsend.
5. Sampled every bar in Port Townsend.
6. Spent an extra night in Port Townsend.
7. Met Crazy White Haired Mechanical Genius, who used the magic tools in his Yellow Van Truck Bus to fix the boat, charging us only one tuna sandwich and several paper towels.
8. Sailed to DadVB’s house for July 4th, also known as “Hey Everyone, this is The Colleague!”
9. Went on ill-fated Gulf Islands charter cruise (forever know as “The Trip”) with DVD and DadVB. No fun was had by anyone but yours truly. Highlight? Trail running on Cypress Island. Spectacular.
10. Vegas Baby! (Which unfortunately also included hung over drive to Pasadena from Vegas, which took 7 hours and featured such epically bad decisions as eating at Panda Express in the mall, and scarfing down BK French fries like I was courting a heart attack).
11. Pasadena? This is where The Colleague grew up? Hi dad. Hi Colleague’s childhood friends. Hi rich white people. Running in this town is as scary as running in the hood, but for very different reasons.
12. Here’s a nice house. Let’s move in! Ok? Ok. Towse, I’ll give you ONE guess which high school I know live walking distance from…turns out as an adult, my hometown isn’t so bad. I think I get why people voluntarily live there.
13. Montana? This is where The Colleague’s mom voluntarily lives? Hi Colleague’s brothers and cousins. Highlights? Floating the Clark Fork with the whole family, running at altitude (ouch), swimming at Flathead Lake.
14. Whidbey Island? Not bad. Daughter GVB’s stomach virus? Bad news. Sorry kid.
15. G Love and Special Sauce with Ozomatli. We won’t mention the third band. It hurts me too much to think about.

Now…here’s where we are now. The Colleague and I (and our respective offspring) are officially co-habitating. Now Sweater Girl and Pear Shaped Woman can REALLY come unglued at work. Fuck you.

Cap’n Ron and I are in full marathon training mode. Portland is October 7th. Our first long run of the training cycle went off without a hitch.

And, as you read this I am recovering from a day of packing the Urban Palace, a fast 7 miler, and a 22 mile bike ride from the Urban Palace to the New Suburban Estate.

Any questions?