Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Are You A Douchebag?


The Colleague and I are freshly returned from San Francisco. It was an educational experience. And by educational, I mean that our time in the city reaffirmed things we already knew about people we don't like...

  1. If you are in your early 20s and you walk around with your Powerbook talking about how "killer" your new startup graphic art studio is, YOU ARE A DOUCHEBAG.
  2. If you wear white size XXL button down shirts with lace adornment and the cuffs turned up, YOU ARE A DOUCHEBAG.
  3. If you drive a Ford F-250 with chrome wheels and a lift kit, YOU ARE A DOUCHEBAG.
  4. If you don't realize that it is 2008 and calling two men "fags" is not only NOT offensive but illustrative of your deeply seeded homosexual fantasies, YOU ARE A DOUCHEBAG.
  5. If you have any sticker on your truck that expresses your support of our current president, YOU ARE A DOUCHEBAG.
  6. If you are over 30 and have a MySpace page which you actively update, YOU ARE A DOUCHEBAG.
  7. If you are the two dudes sitting in front of us on Alaska Air flight #333 from San Francisco to Seattle on March 31st, YOU ARE MOST DEFINITELY DOUCHBAGS.
That is all.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

If you are the French Canadian stiff responsible for torturing Al and Fred over the last two days in our Desire 2 Learn training, you are most DEFINITELY a DOUCHEBAG!

Anonymous said...

I have to say I'm really enjoying the recent renaissance of the word douchebag. It seemed to fade for a decade or so but is now back with a vengeance.

You'll enjoy the site www.hotchickswithdouchbags.com. Watch out for "The Gator."

-Dave D.